Week 13 – Say It Ain’t So


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Date: 01 December 2008
Category: NFL
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Leodis McKelvin and the Buffalo Bills

For a team that held the NFL’s 23rd ranked Offense scoreless for 2 quarters, the Buffalo Bills really suck. McKelvin was flagged twice for big SF gains, and the Defense only stopped the 49ers on half of their 3rd downs. The real factor in this, a game that was fairly even by-the-numbers, was redzone efficiency. The Bills had 4 chances in the redzone and came up empty every time. The 49ers reached the rezone only twice, but came away with one score, and that proved to be the difference.

Arizona Offense and the Run

Answer: 25. If you thought the Question was, “How many carries should a workhorse back like Edgerrin James┬áreceive per game?”, you’d be a fool. The real question to that answer is, “How many rushing yards did the Cardinals rack up against the Eagles in Week 13?”. That’s right, 25 yards. Rookie Tim Hightower, who has taken over the starter role from James, ran for 7 yards on 7 carries. Say it ain’t so, Tim! You are garbage! Boldin had one rush in that game and gained one more yard than you did in seven tries. Please, beg the coaching staff to put the Edge back on the field. They are obviously retarded.

Cincinnati and Detroit

You’re stinking up the midwest. How on earth did you manage that tie? There are so many issues to deal with in these two cities, it would almost be better to fold both teams and give two new expansion teams waiver seniority over the players that are released. In fact, if the league agrees to name one of those expansion teams “The Bengals”, and retain their badass uniforms, I might even officially back such an effort.

Peyton Manning and his Ego

The NFL is no country for old men. Watching Peyton this season has been painful. Today, after he fumbled on the goal line, there was a shot of him walking on the sideline holding his helmet. He looked like absolute shit. Peyton, say it ain’t so! You have 12 INTs and only 19 TDs! Granted, you don’t have a 6 INT game this season, but come on man, with the Titans kicking ass, you’re playing for a WILDCARD. You need to step it up.

Mike Shanahan and his Dirty Coaching

Was it me, or did a Bronco fall down in pain every time Jet Favre tried to rush to the line? That has to be coached. In fact, maybe that’s what they practiced the whole week leading up to the Raider game…and finally installed it this week. On a side note, why doesn’t someone Scotchgard┬áthe coaches jackets? Mangini looked pissed on the sideline this afternoon. I can’t imagine that a soaking wet jacket helps in that situation.

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